A mental breakdown? Maybe not quite yet. A few more days at least….
It is indeed beginning to look a lot like christmas….In our house it has been this way since November. After the year we’ve had i figured a few fairy lights might cheer us all up and i was right! I still haven’t had much luck on the job front but i remain optimistic. I plan on enjoying EVERY second of christmas whether i am working or not. It may be different this year and we may not have been able to spoil the kids as much as we normally would, but you know what? That doesn’t matter. This year all we are thinking about is the amazing dinner that yours truly will be concocting and all the fun and games we have planned. we are very much family christmas kinda people but this year the emphasis on family seems even more important. we have spent all year being miserable and wishing for some semblance of normality and christmas will help us to do that! It may seem silly to some people but christmas with family games and lots of good food is normal for us and we are all so excited for it! Plus, i may have been unlucky enough to be made redundant BUT i am now lucky enough to be home on christmas eve! (unless of course the perfect job comes along) Me being home on christmas eve is something that hasn’t happened in 5 years so myself and my children are all really looking forward to it. Movies, baking and games are just a few of the activities we have planned before the present drop for family… i honestly can’t wait!
So many things have hone wrong this year, so much so that i am wishing for it to be over and i NEVER do that! I am a person who likes to take note and squeeze every ounce of memories i can out of a year but this year i just want it to be over so we can start new and hopefully get back to some sort of normal. I can’t say that this year has been a total bust. i spent lots of time with my kids and i loved it, i mean some days they had me wondering why i had ever had children, but mostly i loved it! We had no reason to rush and we had fun!
There isn’t much point to this post really other than me making sure everyone knows that my christmas spirit is out if full force for everyone to see. My anxiety has been a pain and i have had some VERY dark days in the 14 days since my redundancy but i have put my big girl pants on and plastered a smile on my face. Sometimes its real sometimes its not…. The point is to my kids,…..I’m just smiling!
Merry christmas all xxx